UGLY PRIDE

PRIDE

Pride. Pride is the thief of my joy. President Ezra Taft Benson of the LDS church said, “Pride is essentially competitive in nature.” I have seen pride destroy people, homes and marriages. It truly is, as President Benson said, competitive.

Unfortunately, I have seen pride destroy a marriage of a close family friend. As I have watched and tried to support this marriage from a small distance I have been amazed at the competitive nature of the two people. They have both let pride into their hearts so much so that their marriage has reached a competitive place, however, instead of competing together for a common goal, they are competing against each other in all aspects of life. Instead of supporting her husband with his new business he told him he would fail and that he would look stupid and that he would never be successful. She was so concerned that he would fail or that it would make them look bad that she tore him down. In that same breath she was trying to start her own small dance studio. He, in turn, told her it would never take off. He said that she would never get clients and that they should never invest their money in something so destined to fail.

We saw these scenarios play out in this marriage countless times. It seemed so painful for these two let alone painful to watch. I watch this erode their marriage. Their incessant competitions and constant need of approval from their acquaintances broke them. President Benson also said, “Pride is a sin that can readily be seen in others but is rarely admitted in ourselves.”

This couple is chose to ignore the warning signs of pride and they chose to carry on in their stubborn and prideful ways. They refused to change and they refused to strictly rely on themselves and not on the opinions of those around them.

HUMILITY

President Benson said that the “antidote for pride is humility.”

This post seems like a total downer. I kind of intended it to be that way. It is a sort of wake up call to all the people in strong marriages or weak ones. Pride is destructive and will and has taken all of us at some points in our lives.

However, if we focus on humility we feel full and peaceful. It can be the little things. If my husband and I are bantering about a fact and I think that I am 100% right and he is doggone sure that he is right, we resolve it one of two ways.

1. Google becomes our best friend. It turns into a fun and playful experiences verses an “I know more than you know” experience.
2. Or, one of us simply concedes. We say that we must be mistaken and give the other person an atta boy for knowing something.

It didn’t always work that way in our marriage. I couldn’t believe that I had to be right about something so menial and meaningless.  We have learned how to be humble. We are combatting our prideful ways everyday.

I think that we all need ways to help our marriages combat the little heads of pride that show their nasty heads at times. As you tweak our little prideful habits daily I promise that you will find yourself in a happier and more fulfilling relationship!